Adolescents

The British miniseries Adolescence continues to win praise on social media and in specialized forums, although it also faces some criticism.

It might serve as a good excuse to introduce this text, especially now that, unfortunately, the successful Cuban television series Calendario is beginning to fade from memory.

But it's better to turn our attention to a closer environment —this Island— to understand how necessary it is to continue supporting parents and families in general during their children’s adolescence.

It is adolescents who often engage in extremely risky behaviors. In their eagerness to discover new things, they may want to smoke, try other harmful substances, or become sexually active without the proper preparation or precautions. In their desire to be accepted and recognized by their peers, they demand things from adults or do whatever it takes to wear certain clothes or own the latest cellphone on the market.

Because of all this and much more —details that don't need to be spelled out here, since anyone living in an average neighborhood is likely already familiar with them— it is worth sharing some insights from the United Nations Children’s Fund (UNICEF), which interviewed Dr. Lisa Damour, an American psychologist and expert on adolescents, and author of several books on the subject.

When asked about how adolescents perceive risk, Dr. Damour explained that the way they reason about risks can be influenced by the context they’re in.

“When they’re with adults or in low-stress situations, they tend to think carefully about behaviors that might involve risk. However, when they’re with friends or in emotionally charged social situations, they’re less likely to be rational and more likely to act impulsively.

“The kinds of risks adolescents take are largely determined by the norms in their lives, the amount of supervision they’re under, and the types of risky activities they have easy access to.”

Asked what parents or caregivers can do if they believe their teen is putting themselves in danger, Dr. Damour recommends first establishing reasonable boundaries, as supervision can reduce the chances of risk.

Secondly, she suggests that adults present themselves as allies. “It’s important to remember that teens need to be involved in their own safety. We should talk with them about how to make safe choices when we’re not around and make sure they feel comfortable asking us for help if they need it.”

She mentions that it’s often more effective to talk with teens about how to protect themselves from danger than to simply impose rules or principles, which they may find arbitrary.

She emphasizes how important it is for teens to know they might need help from the adults in their lives to stay safe. In that regard, she proposes saying something like this:

“We’re going to ask you to make good choices and to be very careful, but if you find yourself in a situation where you or your friends might be in danger, we want you to come to us for support. We promise you won’t regret asking for our help.”

These points are worth reading slowly and even going through the full interview.

In any case, just as we can’t talk about “the family” as if it were a single, uniform concept, we shouldn’t speak of adolescents as if they were a homogeneous and predictable age group. Every teen is unique, and their parents know that —but efforts like these, without a doubt, are a way of loving them.

Translated by Sergio A. Paneque Díaz / CubaSí Translation Staff